We open with a phone conversation between Mark and Bonnie who is now on her way out the door of Nxivm. Problem is, her husband Mark is still very much under the spell of Keith. Bonnie says she is noticing things just aren’t right. Mark says she has bad “data” (Nxivm lingo) and there must be some kind of misunderstanding. Bonnie says she knows there is no good way to leave because the group goes after their enemies and former members. Which is an example of not just a red flag everyone must have chosen to ignore, but a huge red banner. What a great organization I am in! Okay, sure, it seeks to harass and destroy anyone that leaves or criticizes it, but that is just an example of… Okay, I have no idea how you would rationalize that. Anyway, intro.
It’s a new song. Dream State (Brighter Night) by Son Lux featuring none other than Bonnie Piesse. It’s kind of a creepy and sad song at the same time and fits perfectly. The opening shots work too. Arty and moody pics interspliced with footage of shiny happy people from the last episode. It creates this weird unsettling vibe and everything has a gloomy tinge to it now.
We hear in voice over Bonnie talking to Mark on the phone about her issues with Nxivm. Mark is like, well, I talked to Keith about how to support you. Ugh, wrong move, Mark. But it shows how enmeshed he is with Keith that he doesn’t hear how unhelpful that would be. To his wife. Who is clearly not first on his priority list. Bonnie’s like, really, no need. She also tells him she thinks Keith is going to work hard to hold onto him. You can hear how defensive Mark is in response to that. He’s a friend, Mark basically says. “I feel a certain sense of responsibility.” I say, what about your wife??
Ew.
When Bonnie first met Keith in 2010 she thought, “Ew. Something’s a bit gross.” Keith kisses everybody on the lips for one, which Bonnie found unpleasant. She decided to overlook that, because she had loved the five day ESP intensive she took and well, Keith was the one who created it. So, she decided to ignore her gut reaction to him and focus on the positive things he had done for people and still wanted to do.
We see a video clip of when Bonnie first met Keith. She mentions she has heard he is a concert pianist? “I wouldn’t say that,” Keith says. The tone of voice he uses implies that he’s at least close to that, not that he’s bragging or anything. Keith says he played “a very limited number of songs at a pretty high level” but this was decades ago. Covering his bases. Bonnie’s a musician so she might recognize his lack of skill; better not push too hard with that one.
Keith begins playing Beethoven’s “Moonlight Sonata” which I swear is his one piano parlor trick. He closes his eyes and takes on the posture of a soulful pianist while some of his followers watch.
Bonnie interrupts his little performance to say she’d like to ask him about getting more support. I think she means in terms of her music career, because he then asks her to sing so he can hear her vocal range. Keith suggests she join the ESP singing group Simply Human and practice three hours a day.
The singing group is where Bonnie met actress Allison Mack, who was already in the throes of her Keith worship. Allison was very devoted to “the mission.” You know, the mission to save the world through Keith’s tech/tools/programs. We then see a video clip of Allison looking like she has just come from a yoga/meditation retreat saying how much better the world would be if just a small percentage experienced the love that comes from Keith’s programs (I am paraphrasing).
Bonnie was amazed by the EM (Exploration of Meaning) tech of ESP for real though. It took her 2.5 years to be promoted to orange sash (proctor) which required recruiting people into the program, volunteering to give people EMs, running workshops and taking expensive courses to overcome her “disintegrations.” She was barely getting by financially and was so busy she barely had time to sleep.
Keith kept pushing her to do more with the promise that once she had reached a certain point on “The Stripe Path” she could start earning commissions. That way Bonnie could continue her work with ESP and make it a career. But, every time Bonnie was close to reaching the level needed to qualify, they’d raise the standards. So her workload just increased. It was all about being productive, pushing through, becoming comfortable with being uncomfortable, because comfort is the enemy of growth and all that jazz. It was just a push to work more, more, more. It’s for your own good and the good of the world!
Bonnie felt suffocated by the pressure. She was burnt out and unhappy. When she looked around nobody else looked happy either. She couldn’t say specifically what was wrong, but it was just a growing feeling she had things weren’t right. Feelings were just “visceras”—viscera means internal organs like the intestines, according to google— and feelings were to be controlled.
We see video of Keith saying, “We want to empower people. Particularly the way our will interfaces with our body, our neurology, our viscera.” Yeah, I have no idea what he means other than it’s a pretentious way to say the goal was to become less emotionally reactive through using Keith’s tech, I guess. Honestly, I don’t know.
Bonnie was starting to fall apart from working so hard and she began having blood sugar crashes. One night she was supposed to perform with Simply Human, but had to bail because she felt so unwell. Later she met with Keith who asked her what happened. In recorded conversation, we hear Bonnie explain she thought she was going to pass out. Keith is like, yeah? So? “…when you’re ser-ving hu-man-ity”, he says in this choppy affected way, “[you’re] serving your inner self. You know?” He continues, “And that sort of servitude is not slavery.” Except servitude literally means slavery. Keith doesn’t know the difference between the words service and servitude. Keith concludes Bonnie is enslaved to worry, pettiness and materialism. Bonnie replies that she does feel enslaved. Keith says that’s a good first step. It’s genuinely impressive the way Keith can hold an entire conversation and make no sense at all.
Bonnie decided she needed to leave, because she could no longer ignore her gut that was screaming at her at this point. Before she left, she had a talk with Allison Mack. Allison was very underweight and Bonnie confronted her about that. Allison said Keith was monitoring her and said she was fine. She showed Bonnie her belly chain that symbolized her complete submission to him and the vow she had made. Ooo, gurl. Bonnie says at the time, she thought it was weird, but she didn’t see the darkness in it. How about the grossness in it?
Before she officially packed it in, Bonnie reached out to a former member to talk about Nxivm. The ex-member referred to the ESP program as “a high control group,” a term used to describe cults, and that in her opinion, the program was intentionally designed that way.
That was it. Bonnie was done. She called Keith. “Here’s what I see,” she told him. His organization, and all its little sub-companies, were built on “abuse, obligation, guilt and coercion.” She could no longer support it and she was out. I must say, I love how ballsy Bonnie was about calling Keith and telling him directly why she was leaving. Keith responded with some bullshit about how Bonnie liked to see herself as a victim.
We see video footage of Nancy Salzman talking about fear. When we’re making decisions based on fear, she tells us, it’s not your psyche controlling your decision making, but your body and the world controlling your psyche. No denying there is truth in that, but within this organization it’s completely distorted. We then see video footage of Keith babbling about joy versus misery. Misery, Keith tells us, is self-pitying.
Once Bonnie left Nxivm she was no longer able to talk to people still in because she was perceived as dishonorable and weak. Bonnie questioned herself. She had a lot of self-doubts about whether or not she had done the right thing. Plus, Mark was still very much in.
Bonnie was sent a form from the legal department of Nxivm. By signing she would be committing to remaining on good terms with the company with no ethical or unresolved issues. They also wanted to have a formal “exit interview” with her. Bonnie refused both. In a recorded phone call we hear Mark say he doesn’t think “they” (the Nxivm legal department and Keith presumably) are going to be okay with her refusing. Bonnie basically says, tough shit. We hear more recorded conversation where Bonnie says to Mark he is going to have to do the Nxivm part of his life without her.
Mark and Keith
We are going back all the way to 2004 to understand the development of Mark and Keith’s friendship. Keith had asked Mark to come to Albany, New York from LA where Mark lived. The purpose being he and Mark could talk about potential film projects they could develop together. That was exactly the kind of thing Mark had been hoping to do so he agreed to move to Albany indefinitely.
Keith lived in a suburb called Clifton Park and so did lots of Nxivm people or ESPians as they all called themselves. They all were within walking distance of each other pretty much so it was like this community hub. At night everybody was expected to go to a place called The Sports Barn to play volleyball. Yup, volleyball. Keith would show up around 11:30 pm or so and everyone would play until the early morning.
A producer asks Mark why going to The Sports Barn to play volleyball became the traditional social gathering for the Albany ESPians. Mark explains it was a great opportunity to get together, and between matches, everybody would circle around Keith to listen to his pontificating on this or that.
In 2005 Mark started a project where he would basically record Keith and the various goings on at Nxivm. This film would serve as an archive of the man who was going to change the world. More people got involved in filming and writing down Keith’s every utterance so it became this big ass project. Mark, at the request of Keith, started recording his phone calls so he wouldn’t miss anything important.
We see night footage of Keith walking with Mark at like, two in the morning, because along with volleyball all night, Keith loved to go for long walks. I mean he liked to walk for hours. And always in the dead of night. He’d call up anybody to join him and they all obeyed like it was a privilege.
In this footage Keith is yammering on about how the world offers no safety net for people and “we” have to be that safety net. I’m not saying this wasn’t a noble idea, but how exactly was this being done? By charging a small fortune to experience Keith’s magical methodology? Regardless of what I think, this moved Mark a great deal. “I yearned to be like him,” Mark says.
Mark and Keith started writing a screenplay together called “Carbon Crimes” and I am not going to get into it, because I don’t think it’s necessary. The overall point is Mark was doing what he had always wanted to do. Make movies he believed would impact the world in a positive way. He was like an eager student and “for seven years of my life, I call Keith every. Single. Day.”
We see a lot of clips of Mark and Keith chatting and it’s clear they enjoy each other’s company. It’s especially obvious Mark has put Keith on a pedestal. He feels incredibly flattered the man with the highest IQ in the world has chosen him to be his buddy. He is besotted.
Mark goes on to explain he had all of his closest friends, including Sarah Edmonson, within the ESPian community. Basically all his needs were being met in this one group. “For the first time in my life I had the feeling like, I am with me and I love me. Omigod, this is what self-love is. …the feeling that every human being in the world wants. It’s priceless.” Magic 8-ball says, outlook not so good.
I think the filmmakers do a good job of letting Mark tell us, in his own words, the problem with his feelings of self-love are so much came from the external validation that is Keith Raniere. Mark believed Keith was this more evolved superior human being who had chosen him to be his closest friend. What an honor! He had this great sense of purpose in his life, because his work was focused on Keith whom he believed was going to change the world. What important work! His romantic partner and closest friends were all in the same organization, too. Keith was running the engine of Mark’s life. That artificial high of self-love couldn’t last. Welcome back to the human struggle, Mark.
We cut more to present day and we hear a phone conversation between Sarah and Mark. Bonnie has left Nxivm, so this would be around 2017. Sarah wants to know what’s going on with Bonnie leaving. Are Mark and Bonnie still together? Mark admits he has some concerns “about various things [within the organization], but I’m still here.” He doesn’t know what that means about his relationship with Bonnie.
“Questioning him felt like I’d question everything about myself,” Mark tells us. But Bonnie was insistent and pushing him to wake up and see what she was seeing. She even gave him cult books to read. But, Mark was still talking to Keith all the time and he still had Mark wrapped around his finger.
We hear a recorded conversation between Mark and Keith where Keith does a good job of emotionally manipulating Mark by implying he (Keith) is the one who is the most vulnerable in the friendship. “I don’t know if you realize it, but I sort of took you on… what I am talking about is friendship. It’s a vulnerable risk thing. That’s why I don’t have many—take on many people as friends.” Aw, my heart breaks.
DOS
Mark wants more “data” (proof) of the bad shit in Nxivm. Bonnie, having talked to another ex-member, has the person give Mark a call. We hear an unnamed woman’s voice tell Mark about being invited by her ESP coach to join a secret women’s group. One of the requirements to join is to provide “collateral”. Deeply personal and private info that if revealed, would be very hurtful. In other words, blackmail. “That’s fucking creepy!” the woman says. She tells Mark her coach has changed a lot, lost a lot of weight, seems tired… she also peeped at her coach’s phone once and saw she had texted, “I love you my master” to someone. “I’m like, what the fuck is going on here? There’s something wrong,” Mark says. He still thought Keith was amazing, but he acknowledged some fucked up shit was going on.
Mark called Keith to ask if he knew about this secret group. We hear the audio from the call. So many women are becoming underweight and zombie-like, Mark tells him. Keith responds with the most bullshit spiel that I am not even going to type it out, because it’s so absurd. Mark says he is worried, but he backs off. “There’s no hard data,” Mark says. Keith promises he will look into it for him.
For Mark it was tough to go against Keith “who has had 12 years working his way into my psyche.” He was torn between trusting Bonnie, who was considered a “suppressive person” by the organization at that point, or Keith.
Mark called Keith one more time. In recorded audio, we hear Keith tell Mark he has investigated what they had talked about last. There is a group of women using his “technology” with his blessing, but other than that, he doesn’t know much about it. Mark tells him he doesn’t believe him. In fact, he thinks Keith is in charge of it. Mark’s tone of voice is firm, but without anger. “I hate this hearsay, inspecific [lol] stuff,” Keith whines. He continues to deny he has anything to do with the group. Mark continues to say he doesn’t believe him. Keith never loses his cool. Mark doesn’t either. He finishes the call by saying he thinks whatever is going on could really blow up in Keith’s face. Keith agrees, but in a tone of voice that seems to say, “Someone is making a mess, but it’s not me!”
Mark tells us at that point he was certain Keith was lying. And if he was lying about this, what else had he lied about? “The damn had cracked,” Mark says. He told Bonnie he was leaving Nxivm.
Neither Mark or Bonnie have commented on this as far as I know, but I have to wonder if Keith had been plotting to break Bonnie and Mark up for awhile. Keith kept pushing Bonnie, never letting her reach the point where she could earn a living from Nxivm while still pushing her harder and harder. What did he think was going to happen? Burn out was inevitable. So, what choice would she have other than leaving? I think he believed Mark would choose him and stay. Maybe Mark resisted at first, but I seriously doubt there was ever any other option. Mark was always going to choose Bonnie.
Mark submitted his resignation letter to the executive board, saying he needed to focus more on his film career. Before he left though, he talked to Sarah Edmonson. We hear the audio from the phone call between them. After telling her how he is basically cracking up and feeling borderline suicidal, Mark is like, I have some [more] fucked up shit to tell you. There’s a secret group of women that have signed a vow and have given collateral. “They are under strict orders as to how much they can eat… And they are trying to recruit other women to do this. That’s fucked up shit.” Sarah says, “Well, you understand that it wasn’t presented that way. It was presented as something else.” And further, whoever is part of the group can’t speak of it.
So now Mark knows Sarah is a member. “Did you give collateral?” he asks her. The recording ends there, because Sarah asked him to turn it off so she could speak freely. Mark tells us Sarah told him about the group which is called DOS, she gave damning collateral and she was branded. Mark’s like, they did what!? She texts him a pic of her brand and it is not pretty.
The episode ends with a close up of Sarah’s face smiling/smirking as ominous music plays. While Sarah is a good looking woman, it’s a creepy shot with that music.
Outro music is “Hit Me Where It Hurts” by Caroline Polachek.
Next week: Episode 3 “At Cause” Sarah tells Mark and us more about DOS, we meet her husband Nippy and her best friend Lauren Salzman, The EXSPians, as I have decided to call them, figure out what they must do next.
Recapulet 
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